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New Year, New Me. How Not to Sexually Harass Someone

New Year, New Me. How Not to Sexually Harass Someone
January 10, 2019 ezekschuba@gmail.com

By Eunice Ngozi Ikem

A lot of us were in a rush to leave 2018 and port to the 2019 which is actually a good thing. To be honest the year was moving so slow but yet so eventful. So for me, and I am sure a lot of us do it too; we ask ourselves, What are we doing different this year. I know people always have a list, some we take to church on crossover night and anoint with oil (We know ourselves). For me, I made a lot of resolutions but I think this is one we should all abide by; HOW NOT TO SEXUALLY HARASS SOMEONE.

In simple terms, you should only have sex with someone if the person consents to it and this applies to both the male and female gender. I believe we have been enlightened enough and it’s high time we put all we’ve learnt on harassment to book. Harassment can occur anywhere and anytime so preventing it from happening will be our priority this year. We often hear a lot of people say ‘I didn’t know she/he didn’t like it’ or ‘I didn’t know it made her/him uncomfortable’. Well that is why you have us, we would teach you simple ways you can relate with people without sexually harassing them.

It’s not new to hear other co-workers are harassing co-workers or superiors but there are so many ways these can be prevented. For example, everyone just resumed back to work and are all excited to see each other, telling a woman or a man you work with “Hello! You look well” is totally fine! But yelling “Nice ass!” at her/him in the office? Not so okay. Try to be very polite in your approach, choice of words and gesticulations. There’s never a reason to touch someone without asking unless they’re falling, and you’re the only thing between them and plummeting to their death. And even then, they’d probably be screaming “HELP!” which is your cue to, you know, help.

Let’s dive into those who find it easy just rubbing and touching everyone around them, you have to put your hand on someone’s shoulder, or back, or knee, or anything else, without asking. Even if you’re trying to comfort someone, a simple “Would you like a hug?” or “Can I give you a hug?” is great, and if they need a hug, they’ll gladly say yes. Having said these, it’s okay to follow these 10 do’s and don’t to help us stay away from harassing anybody around us.

 

S/N

DO’s

DON’T’S

1

Offer sincere compliments.

Don’t offer compliments about a person’s body. E.g. You look like you’ve added weight in the right places o’

2

Make conversation, requests and gestures that facilitate work or friendship.

Don’t make conversation, requests and gestures of a sexual nature.

3

Greet other people in a friendly way.

Don’t whistle, make catcalls or leer. Its 2019, lets be guided please.

4

Be a kind and caring friend, co-worker and person. Just treat people the way you would appreciated to be treated.

Don’t pat, rub or otherwise touch someone unless they ask you to. Not just for sexual reasons but Hepatitis is real people!!

5

Greet people with a wave or a handshake.

Don’t greet everyone you see with a hug. Some people don’t like to be touched.

6

Wear clothing that you like and make you feel attractive. It’s your body, do what you wish.

Don’t take of said clothes in public.

7

Tell jokes and share funny memes.

 

Don’t tell jokes or share funny memes that are sexist or of a sexual nature.

8

Pursue friendships and even romantic relationships.

 

Don’t think the friendship or romantic relationship gives you full access to the person. Still ask. You won’t die to be honest.

9

Eye contact isn’t bad especially when communicating.

Don’t stare for too long please. That’s just creepy and uncomfortable.

10

Lastly, try and learn the body language of the people you relate with. Make an effort.

Everyone isn’t the same. You don’t have the same relationship with everyone. Learn how to treat people.

 

Let’s all have an amazing year and stay away from sexual harassment and all that’s attached to this. HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM STER!!!

 

Photocred: Fine Art America